It has been awhile, WordPress.

I haven’t been so diligent to post on this WordPress as I would have expected.  It may have to do with the fact that I have a phone that allows me to post short, grammatically unchecked, snippets on my other less formalized blog.  Every once in awhile though, I stumble upon another person’s blog post that inspires me to write again.  It is difficult though, what with an undercurrent of mediocrity pushing against me quietly, forcefully.  There’s a little voice that nags, something about not being enough.  It is a voice that has bulldozed my ambition and hope.  I am afraid that I have lost something vibrant, somehow, somewhere, sometime, and that I cannot have whatever it is back.  An intangible item, the voice says.  Something I cannot pin down, something too abstract for measure.  Do I listen to it?  What are dreams of painting to one who wakes up to realize she has gradually become blind without any notice?

Caught up with an old high school friend today.  Got a window into the working world of a Stanford techy grad.  So the Cal-Stanford rivalry has played until its last breath.  Just kidding.  Anyway, we chatted about old friends, what we have been up to in the last, oh, four years, and music, of course, music.  I commented on how music these days just seems to all sound the same.  Was it just me?  It wasn’t just me, he agreed.  Now, that brings me to my point.  Why does music seem so lacking in creativity now?  Is the brilliant music just hiding out somewhere, away from the radio charts?  Or am I just pickier than ever, harshly aware of the emptiness of the world?  Is it that philosophical, or does the music these days just really, plainly, frankly, suck?  I don’t like being a hater, but why is it, that a catchy, pretty song, has lyrics that go “I shoulda bought you flowers”.  And that, my friend, is why your baby is dancin’ with another man.  Obviously.  Criticism aside, my friend mentioned that he had learned the piano part for that song as well as “Just Give Me a Reason” which also has a lovely piano part.  I am thus re-inspired to hit the keyboard that I never play and learn some popular music.  We’ll see.

Then I want to hook it up to GarageBand.  And then I want to become famous by selling records.  Maybe.

If anything, I realized, times are changing.  Media is shifting gears it seems.  The lines are blurring between work and play.  And now your baby’s dancin’.


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