The Kondo Method

I finally finished the book, The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up, and Marie Kondo is crazy!  I respect her, and she knows her tidying stuff, but I find myself unable to achieve her kind of perfection in tidying.  There is somewhat of a cult-like following of her method, and I can totally see why.  Maybe if I lived in a different universe, I would be in on it too.  But here are my reasons why I cannot employ the KonMari method of tidying.

  1. Anxiety.  What is this “spark of joy” she talks about?  To start tidying, I picked up a fairly easy shirt that I loved.  I did feel some joy.  But after that, with each additional piece of clothing, I started just feeling anxiety.  What if the next shirt I pick up doesn’t spark joy, and I have to get rid of it?  What if I really like that shirt?  For those of us with mood problems that are heavy overriders of other emotions, something as ethereal as a spark of joy may be hard to come by.
  2. Money.  I feel like you have to be decently well off to have the luxury to simply abandon clothing based on the amount of joy it gives you without a shred of worry.  Or maybe this brings me back to #1.  Anyway.  I have a set of clothes that I use for interviews.  Frankly, I don’t think any of those clothes will spark joy.  They are boring and blah, but they are professional.  Currently, I am not working in a professional field, but I can’t afford to get rid of them to buy new ones that do spark joy when interview time comes around.  The same goes for fine merino wool sweaters that are in bright colors which I bought using points.  I probably will never wear them without a jacket over them, but I can’t imagine tossing it away and having to buy a new wool sweater when I go to a colder climate.  Mom always said I had expensive tastes.  The items I wanted always ended up being the more expensive ones, even when I did not know the price ahead of time.  If I judged everything by whether it sparked joy or not, seriously, I would be spending too much.  Happiness here cannot be the measurement for everything.  Throughout the book, Marie makes the argument that if you end up needing something later, you can always buy it.  I suppose if you’re free from care about the past or future, then you wouldn’t worry about whether or not you’d even be able to later.  I get it, but I can’t totally embrace it.
  3. Sensitivity to soft materials.  Marie Kondo’s method is all about handling the clothes.  I am, however, predisposed to soft fabrics.  I love the feel of anything soft, and my roommates will tell you about how I used to carry my pajamas up to my face as I went to shower for the night.  My pajamas include an oversized Google shirt and gym shorts. Marie Kondo suggests “If you are a woman, wear something feminine and elegant as nightwear. The worst thing you can do is to wear a sloppy sweat suit. If sweat pants are your every day attire, you’ll end up looking like you belong in them, which is not very attractive. What you wear in the house does impact on your self image.”  But I love soft fabrics, and sweat suits are generally softer than feminine and elegant things.  And cheaper (See #2.)  OK, this is definitely taking her out of context, as her point is really that we shouldn’t downgrade clothes that do not spark joy into loungewear.   I’ll give her that.

So there you have it.  I feel like this method is kind of an all or nothing method, so it’s stressing me out a bit.  I’m going through my clothes, and we’ll see how I do.  Maybe instead of looking for the spark of joy, I’ll just have to use other tidying methods.  I was looking forward to the book, based on the reviews, but seriously?  Tidying is not the purpose of my life.  Marie Kondo, and I say this with as much respect and admiration as I can possibly convey, is, crazy.  You’re pretty awesome.  I think I will leave the awesomeness to you.

//edit//

OK, closet partially tackled.  I have to admit, I’m surprised by the sheer volume of clothing I stuffed into drawers, never to be seen again.  Maybe there’s something to this, after all.  But STILL.  I will provide myself with exceptions.

 

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Emojis! =)

When I was not yet going out with now Hubby, we did not talk much.  However, there were some incidents here and there leading up to our courtship that we do remember fondly.  Now that we are married, I ask him to tell me those stories over and over again.

One of them involves an emoji.  We were going over to a family’s house for lunch, and I happened to be grabbing potato salad for the event.  I was running late.  A certain boy was busy barbecuing in the backyard and texted me to say something like “Take your time.  We’ll save food for you =)”.  I remember getting that text while I was on the way to the store with someone I can’t remember who, and smiling to myself.  “How nice!” I thought.  But I also had another thought cross my mind, “He used a smiley face.  That’s interesting… he’s never done that before.  I wonder if he likes me?  But he could be just a nice person.  Hm.  Whatever!”  When I got to the house, I went to say hi to the boys barbecuing.  Hubby remembers that hello very clearly.  I guess it was the first time I actually came to say hi to him?  So there you have it.  The moral of the story is, be careful about sending emojis, guys.  Unless of course if that’s what you’re going for, then send away!

Summer is almost here, and the teachers and students are all counting the days.  I myself have some projects I want to work on, including finishing Marie Kondo’s book about tidying up and cleaning out the mess that is my closet.  I’ve been looking into different options for my old clothes, from donating to selling both locally and online.  Sometimes I get lost in the research and information out there.  It is the same for cooking.  There are just so many recipes to try, and not enough time in life to get through all of them!  I don’t know if it’s because I’m 27 now, but time seems awfully short.  The amount of things I could possibly learn is endless, never mind the things I could do.  I also have a little bit of an itch to bake.  My KitchenAid mixer is sitting somewhere in our kitchen all by itself.  It might just be time to bring it out, now that we’ve finally adjusted the height!  But really, where are my priorities?  Often I feel I am spread thin in my head.  So I curl up into a ball and watch the latest YouTube videos or check on my Neko Atsume cats.  Let me just close my eyes, and sleep.

ThredUp

I wanted to love it, since LikeTwice had closed down.  However, the quality control in ThredUp seems to be inconsistent so far.  I did buy a nice dress from there for a good price the first time around.  The second time though I bought a number of items, and one was advertised as an incorrect brand (a big booboo in my book), and another one had distinct details that were missing from the description/photos.  Overall, I’m not sure it was worth the time spent browsing.  Similar to LikeTwice, the amount of clothing on the site is enormous, but they seem to have not perfected their filter system yet.  Also, buying things online is kind of a risk.  I don’t think I’ll be buying final-sale items again, although the rock bottom prices make it very tempting!

Clothes, Clothes, Clothes.

Recently I’ve been going through a shopping craze.  And by that I mean, adding things to a shopping cart online and not going through with it after reading reviews from the BBB.  I mean browsing through hundreds of pictures of dresses and inspiration.  I mean sending pictures to my friends and hubby and asking them what they think.  I mean wondering what my skin tone is, whether it’s warm yellow and cool yellow.  It’s UGH time consuming.  Stop being so glamorous, fashion bloggers!

This is going to be a lot of rambling, and not in the least bit interesting, just warning you.

So I recently bought a bag from ThredUp because my bag finally lost its magnetic clasp to the wind somewhere at the school I work for.  Of course it did.  I’m so glad I have a work hoodie that I wear everyday because it’s been a few weeks and it already has highlighter and who knows what else all over it.  Anyway, back to the purse.  So I’m kind of excited cause I got a great deal on it, and it should be in “excellent” condition even though it’s secondhand.  But here’s the thing, I’m also worried people will judge me for the brand (Am I the judgmental one?  Oh dear) and think I spent hundreds of dollars on a purse.  So there I was, weighing these things, debating whether I should get a purse.  UGH.  BUT I also read that the quality is actually better with these expensive branded bags, and they can last you a long time, versus my bags my relatives get me from Asia which start shedding fabric chips after a year or so.  (I love you Mom and Auntie and all the bags you’ve ever gotten me I promise!)  The thing is, if I get something that lasts, that means I’m also kind of stuck with it for awhile.  This could be either a good or bad thing.  A day or so later, I found another purse that looked really cute, and I started to regret that I didn’t wait.  I know, the drama.

Next up in life as an adult– need to identify the bug that has been biting me in my sleep.  I’m so scared!  And looking up answers on the internet makes it worse because there are so many gross pictures.

Pretty pictures of tulips instead of bugs found here.

StitchFix #3

Is the third time the charm?  Let’s find out, today, from StitchFix.

Previously on StitchFix, I kept a navy blue owl cardigan and a polka dotted powder blue dress which stood out among items that were less memorable.

This time, I opened my box after my housemate texted me that it had arrived and will I hurry home so she could see it!  I had updated my Pinterest for this one, so I was curious as to what my stylist might think to put in my box this time.

I was flattered by the note “Hi Esther!  I am really excited to be styling you today!  I LOVE your Pinterest style!”  Aw, thanks.

So the items were

1) Collective Concepts Racerback Polka Dot Dress

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But wait, I didn’t ask for a dress?  This one had a very cute pattern, and the fit was alright.  However, I wasn’t a big fan of the racerback or v-neck, and R said it looked like an apron cause of where the waistline was.  Apron?  Ok, no.

2) 41Hawthorn Longsleeve Knit Cardigan

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I wasn’t really excited about this one because it was a solid colored, navy blue, cardigan.  I have lots of cardigans, although I don’t have any long cardigans, so I figured I would try it.  It was supposed to go with the dress, but even with the dress, I felt like the cardigan was, well, too long.  This one was sent back.

3) Kensie Skinny Jeans

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I’m pretty sure I said no jeans.  Did I say no jeans?  I can’t remember.  Anyway, I knew right off the bat that I wasn’t going to keep these because they’re, well, jeans, and $88.  The most I’ve paid for jeans is, well, a lot less than $88, let’s just say.  But I tried them on, and then I wouldn’t take them off.  They were the most comfortable jeans I have ever worn, it was like wearing sweatpants, no joke.  Soft, flexible, perfect, except for the price-tag and the fact that they were a little too skinny for my liking.  Sent back.

4) Under Skies Lace Detailed Short Sleeve Shirt

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So this one was the one both R and I liked on the picture and while holding it up.  We found out though after I tried it on that the lace was indeed, just lace, in the front, and not lace over white.  That was a little bit disappointing since I didn’t know what to wear under it!  Why can’t they just put a white backing to the shirt?  Goodness.  I really liked the color though and the design.  Wasn’t sure if it was too casual of an item to keep.  Anyhow, this one was paired with the next item–

5) Bay to Baubles Pastel Statement Bib

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When I saw this title on the StitchFix card I was like “A BIB?  They sent me a BIB?”, and then I looked in the box and was like “Oh, it’s a necklace.”  Obviously, I don’t buy jewelry, like, ever.  This one had really cute colors and it matched perfectly with the lace shirt, but both my housemates said it would be difficult to match with anything else.  I really liked the necklace surprisingly, but it was also missing a gold ring that held the pieces together.  Strange.  So that was the deciding factor.  I ended up keeping the lace shirt.

All in all, this was a lot of fun!  There weren’t any items that I considered downright ugly and I felt like they pretty much get my sizing every single time.  Good job, StitchFix.

16 Habits of Highly Sensitive People

My dear friend and fellow HSP C, sent me the link to this Huffington Post.  Of course I related to all of the points except for the one about team sports.  I quite like team sports, as long as it is the right team.  Yes, right team, like that’s not hard to achieve.

But what I was more intrigued by was the comments.  One comment was:

“As a MH Counselor – I also see a high correlation of high sensitivity in clients with addictions and ADHD – (if they don’t learn to manage it well – addictions serve them as a ‘fix’) ADD’ers are also tactile and sensitive to the texture of clothing, foods, shoes (hate them!) and sheets. Many parents don’t realize this – but its often the root of tantrums. . . same with sound sensitivity.
Glad to see a public article on this!”

So interesting, especially the part about tantrums.  I wonder what this would look like in action.  I know I’m very sensitive to clothing textures, food, and shoes– wow, the shoes thing, this may explain why I like to wear flip-flops in winter and Dee also does the same exact thing.  I also have a tendency to walk around barefooted even in the winter, and I love the texture of smoothies (smooth, duh).  It’s so strange finding out all these oddball things about you are functions of your own not typical brain, except that thousands of other people also share a similar not so typical brain.  I’m not sure what to make of that.  Just yesterday, I received compliments from L for my outfit, and my first reaction was to tell her how the cardigan was made of wool and was quite itchy.  It bothered me very much and so I was often rolling up my sleeves.  In fact, I do that even with comfortable cardigans.  It makes it easier for me to get work done, play piano, feel at ease.  I guess it’s not as random as I thought it was.  Well, is anything really that random?  I wonder if you could un-randomize a dice toss.  Now that would be a fun research topic.  Or maybe just a tedious and frustrating one.  Or both.

There are so many changes happening for me this week.  On Monday I interviewed, and Thursday I got reprimanded by the B, embarrassingly so, and also at the same time he told me my time was extended.  I didn’t know what to make of it, and I wasn’t that thrilled, especially since I was so disappointed in myself and in him for pointing out my mistake.  Of course, being the conniving person he is, he promptly invited me back in to get my opinion on another item, and that left me a little more assured in his confidence in me.  I don’t know.  I’m still disappointed, if I think about it too much.  It’s hard, not to dwell on things, you know?  And then I also applied for school, in LB.  I’ll hear back in a month.  We also interviewed a new girl, V, on Wednesday, and she’s moving in this weekend.  J is leaving for another town too.  The world keeps moving, and March is quickly settling into the scene, and I’m not ready yet.  I don’t know why I’m not ready, but I’m not.  I feel like I want to pause things, get my thoughts together, and spend some time reflecting on everything that has happened.  I want to let all the conflicting feelings take their place upon the stage and leave as quickly as they came, like birds settling gently upon the bough of a tree and then swiftly flying away.