I’m not into detoxes. I’m really not. I lumped them into all the other fads that I heard about growing up. Atkins, lemon-juice cleanses, the like. But then the other day I got an email from the Instant Pot group (what?) about the 21-day Sugar Detox! And it actually intrigued me. Like, I actually considered doing it. But first I had to do some research. Most of what I’ve read so far seems reasonable, not too far-fetched or crazy. The only thing that is weird is the no fruit thing. I’m also considering how I want to do this, and maybe even just borrowing the book somehow and planning out my own recipe schedule. I need a buddy though. CC said she might do it with me, after the graduation hoopla is over, because you know, wedding coming up. So I might have a buddy! I would have asked my hubby, but I feel bad because he’s got a big sweet tooth! But he might be down. Mainly, I’m just super bloated lately, so I want to see if this kind of diet would help. It doesn’t seem too extreme, which floats my boat, and seems logical enough. Meanwhile, I’ve got sweet potatoes baking in the oven..
I’m trying to study anatomy right now because I have a quiz later. It’s pretty challenging, and I feel like writing because I just read this sappy well-written article in the NYTimes about a couple that, well, let’s just say the ending is happy. I found my way into the student union for study, but there’s a girl a table away sharing the Bible to this guy. She keeps saying things that cause me to look over, like about how “psuche” is the word for soul-life and “zoe” is the word for the eternal, uncreated, incorruptible life. I’m wondering where she got her notes from, cause it sure sounds like Witness Lee, those adjectives together in that order describing the zoe life. But I don’t know her, so I can’t walk over and interrupt their time and ask. And then I heard her talking about John chapter 1, about God being the Word, which in Greek is “logos”. In the meantime, I was talking to a friend about this article I read, and he basically goes, “That’s nice, but that’s not realistic”. I felt like all the sensations swirling around in me were crushed in an instant. I snapped back into reality, and had to acknowledge that he was probably right, it wasn’t really a common thing. After all, I thought to myself, if it was so common, why would someone want to write about it? How many people write about going to the bathroom? Not many, I think. Yet by the way she wrote about her own experience, I felt like she could have been the girl next door writing it. My neighbor, my classmate, some stranger passing down the hallway. But, she wasn’t, I guess. I studied with a classmate today, amidst my neurotic “Oh Lord”s and face buried in my hands, we made good progress. She reminds me of another friend of mine. The resemblance is what they call, striking, uncanny, what? She closed her Bible. Do I go over and interrupt them now?
My perfect pair of pets would be a cat and a dog who like each other. It’s not common, but it just makes sense to me.
I’ve been trying to bond with a bunny rabbit. It’s been a little tough at times, because she gets scared rather easily and when she gets scared I have to give up and call it a day. I did a little research about what I have to do to win her heart over. I guess it didn’t help that the first couple of times we met, I had been petting dogs so I probably smelled like them. Anyhow, I sat in her space, did the ignoring thing, let her smell me, did a little bit of petting, and in general have tried not to reach into her cage space. I did this a number of times and I’ve been making progress, to my surprise. Today I came over and called her name, and put my hand over the edge of her space, and she bounded out of her cage and came over to me to get some pats just like that. Before she would’ve ignored me, or worse, come out and then ran back into her cage and stuck her head behind her litterbox so she couldn’t see me, or, presumably, so I couldn’t see her. Of course, I can still see her, but I don’t think she knows that.
On the flip side, I’ve been trying to get to know people a little bit in class. It’s tough too. Unlike rabbits, my classmates talk. I can’t just give them pats on their heads and feed them hay until they like me.
“I’d never ask you to change” – Bruno Mars
So many sweet, sappy, couples these days. And so it then follows that it must be true, that beauty is in the eye of the beholder. I realized how wrong that sounds (I sure have a habit of saying things seriously and accidentally implying something negative). My point is, isn’t it funny (read: amazing) how our eyes can create perfection out of imperfection, beauty out of broken? It makes me warm and fuzzy inside. Sort of. Cause I’m not so sure it’s too warm and fuzzy in there.
Speaking of couples. M, who I traditionally referred to as “spouse-y” in our high school days, tells me she wants me to “pursue her”. So she asks if I can hangout over the weekend and I go, “I don’t know.. text me..” and she goes “No that’s passive! *laugh*” And I go, “Oh right, I’ll pursue you!” Dear friends.
I’ve reached a sort of plateau it seems. And I’m okay with that, sort of (because I’m never really okay with a plateau). For now. I’ve been debating my next step and so far have reached no conclusions. I’m afraid to take the next leap of faith. My ground has felt like sinking sand for so long, I’m still not sure what solid feels like. Solid maybe sounds like this though:
Give yourself to love the Lord. No other way is so prevailing, so safe, and so full of enjoyment. Just love Him. Do not care for anything else.
Growing up is a strange thing. It is strange because I am at that age where it starts getting a little awkward for people to ask how old I am. What?
Emotionally, it has been a rough day, weeks, year. Each year brings in reflections and today with the morning came a unwanted realization that I am prone to addictions. Addicted to the internet, addicted to my phone. What do you do with it? D and M took me out for lunch, which was very appreciated, and I had a few moments of unadulterated glee from the huge strings of lights in the Hyatt hotel. D also tried to hint at the B to treat us, which of course he smilingly declined to do.
I came home to two lovely, sweet cards, and then proceeded to read a post entitled Justice For Quinten.
It made me sad. But it also satisfied that idealistic, justice-seeking, part of me. So here it is.